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The time has come for the Sprint All-Star Race, and in conjunction with that has come the annual onslaught of hype, hyperbole and promotion.

It's unfortunate that each chapter of such madness is gonna sicken a certain percentage of the population, and this time around, so it is with the vote designed to get the fans involved in the event, and the process.

I guess that's a good thing, though it's troubling to think that someone at Hype Central thinks the event, in and of itself, just ain't good enough to attract anyone's attention.

It's a winner's only all-star race, for God's sake; with at least a million bucks on the line for the winner and a juked-up format designed to drive excitement.

And I know, I know -- before you unleash the floodgates, I know. The fans do select the starting lineups for other sports' all-star games, and they don't do a bad job, across the board.

They must have some kind of parameter in place that prevents 'em from putting Joe Schlabotnick into the starting lineup. Though, from what I'm told, it didn't prevent 'em from voting Magic Johnson into the starting lineup of the NBA All-Star Game, the year he, uh, retired.

Though that year certainly had, shall we say, extenuating circumstances?

But still, no other sports' all-star selection format sinks to the level of the athletes, including some who have actually won some races at some point in their career -- including this very all-star race -- begging for inclusion in their all-star event.

And that's sad.

So I'm here to tell ya -- maintain the vote 'em in process. But it's the All-Star Race -- and at Lowe's Motor Speedway -- of all places.

So here's what I propose: If you're "voted in," you have an extra "tax" in the bargain.

• If you're Michael Waltrip and you're voted in, you have to wear a gauze mouthpiece that would prevent you from speaking in public for a week -- no exceptions for post-race acceptance speeches, TV -- nothing. Would probably be 50-50 that Mikey wouldn't take the spot.

• If you're Robby Gordon and you're voted in, you have to do 10-12 pre-race donuts in the same quad-oval area with one of your Hummer rally trucks. In something that pristine, it should be easy -- and a heckuva lot less of a pre-event travel bill.

• If you're Elliott Sadler and you're voted in, you have to set up at the start/finish line area of the quad-oval and drive five golf balls over the Turn 4 stands. Hope your back is back in shape -- and I don't think I've ever seen anyone sit there, so no lives are at risk.

• If you're Kyle Petty and you're voted in, you must load your car to capacity with Victory Junction Gang campers for the pace laps, and then, on the coming to green lap, go to pit road to remove them.

• If you're Joe Nemechek and you're voted in, your mother, Martha, has to ride in a specially installed right-hand seat, for the race's final segment.

Is that ridiculous? Of course -- but you get the idea. And so is the idea of letting someone into the Sprint All-Star Race based purely on a popularity contest. They ought to just expand the eligible drivers out of the Sprint Showdown qualifying race, from two to three.

You wanna keep the fans involved? Have 'em vote on some aspect of the format. Go back to having 'em vote on the invert -- but here's a clue: I'd vote to invert every darned car that's still running on the lead lap to start the final segment -- but no one would know until they were ready to roll off on the final segment's pace laps.

You wanna talk about the "all-star winner" that that would create. It would be the stuff of which legends are made.

But to earn a start in the "All-Star Race" -- well, you've got to race your way into that, pal. (Continued)